smacks of jealousy

To anyone who actually reads this... so no one:
Have you ever had a moment when you realize everything you've ever thought about something just gets shattered?
I know I have. Sometimes it's for the good and sometimes it's for the BAD.
I'm not going to give any particular names or instances here for the sake that this is a public forum, but there are some people in my life that have pumped information into my brain that I thought to be true. And while it did not affect the way that I viewed people as if I liked them or not, but it did affect the way that I thought that they were in general. I thought about it a lot, and I was thinking where it could all come from. Then it hit me, jealously.
It's so funny how girls are jealous and they'll subconsciously make up reasons as to why things are going the way that they are. To justify why a girl is getting something that they wish they could have, it's something that they want and they don't understand why they don't have it themselves.

This is my effort to not do this. It'll be hard since it seems to stem into the origin our being.

can I explore?

Remember a few posts ago when I said, "I HATE SUMMER" "IT'S COMPARED TO SOMETHING LIKE SCREECHING NAILS ON A CHALKBOARD MIXED WITH DRINKING PEA IN THE DARK" ?

I take it back. This summer has turned out differently than I expected. There are laughs and late nights and fun times a lot of money spent and a lot of money saved. A lot of sweat lost but in a good way, and plenty of self built up. Friends have been deepened..... and broadened. Horizons explored. Movies watched, shows started and homework almost late, but always finished.

I'm tired, and still on the pasty side but this summer is not lonely and it is not private and it is not set apart. Now don't get me wrong my frandz, I am longing for days of PUMPKINS and  SCAREMARE and COOLER WEATHER and running OUTSIDE! But I've enjoyed my time in Lynchburg with its pretty sunsets that can be compared to cotton candy or a spring dress and its mini-golf. It's coming to a close, and for the first time I think I can say that I'm not looking forward to it.

VA TEN MILER UPDATE:

I haven't registered. I started training. Three miles today! Three!! Seven, to go. I'll register for the race this weekend. I'll pack this weekend as well, for next week, I move to another house where I'll owe most of my money to for the next nine months. 

con fuss ing

I've never been around so many people who don't know what is going on. The worst part is that they are paid to know.

found the Irish a bit odd

Who says that punctuation has to be accurate. Not me? Try again, teach!

i do not exist

debbie downs. that's how i feel right now. but i am on my break, and I thought about it. What is worse than this? Standing for 9 hours straight, asking every customer how they are. Every customer is every citizen in the whole tri-state area.
So this is okay. I'm alright, guys. A OK.